


Poker night with a know it all

by Chacw



Series: The chronicle of a quiet demon who gets caught up in other people's problems [2]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe - Transcendence (Gravity Falls)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 05:35:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14710094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chacw/pseuds/Chacw
Summary: Alcor invited Chazun to poker, here is his first time playing with the pines and friends.





	Poker night with a know it all

**Author's Note:**

> ok, so I don't know all the rules to poker, so I did research but if there are errors in the story with the poker stuff feel free to roast me.
> 
> thanks again Ragga! (roast them too, they know as little as I do)

Chazun realized once he got home he forgot something, how on Earth was he supposed to show up to a poker game in the physical plain? After spending a good hour debating the pros and cons of possible solutions he decided on the simplest, and possibly the most potentially risky, approaching the border of Gravity Falls he made sure Alcor knew of his presence. Waiting for Alcor to show up, he floated down till it looked like he was sitting on top of a nearby stump, of course he couldn't touch it, but he thought it made him look “cool”. Alcor came ripping into the clearing with murder on his face, but after he saw it was Chazun he slowed down to a slow float over while the black surrounding him retreated back to his normal suit and tie, floating down to sit cross legged in the air in front of Chazun. He raised his eyebrow and simply said without the demonic static.

“You’re early, should I ask why?”

Deciding it would be rude to go with the demonic static now that Alcor had dropped it, Chazun decided to simple respond with.

“I forgot something.”

“Isn't your whole deal to learn and remember everything?”

“Yes, well I can't know everything all the time, otherwise I would have foresaw the connection of Tesla’s soul to what would become you.”

Still being slightly freaked out with how much this demon knew about him, Alcor politely said

“Okay, but what brings you here?”

“I realized that if i was going to play poker with you I would need to be summoned so I could, you know, hold the cards, which lead to me realizing that I never gave you a circle to summon me with. Now know this, if my circle ever gets leaked I will prank the shit out of you until time ends, and with what the prophecies say about you and time, that's going to be a while.”

“Understood, now are you going to give it to me?”

“Oh yes, do you have a pen and paper?”

Rolling his eyes alcor reached up and pulled a sparkly blue gel pen out of his head along with what looked like black construction paper and handed it over. Chazun sketched out a book with bindings on all four corners then a large eye in the center of the top of the book normally were the title would be, two eyebrows underneath then a large fanged grin below that, after making sure his symbol was perfect he neatly drew a large pentagon around the book with bolder lines connecting one corner to the center of the opposite edge breaking only so the line wouldn't be drawn over the book. After all five lines were drawn he drew a circle around the pentagon and between the circle and the pentagon he wrote something in a language Dipper didn't recognize. After staring at it for a second thinking his actions he handed it over to Alcor, then reached up to his face and drew on a small fanged lopsided grin.

“Keep that safe Alcor.”  
He said as he stood up and turned around to where he knew chewy was watching the interaction, slowly Chewy loped over to the two and was rewarded with a wonderful scratching from Chazun.

“Oh, if you want me to bring Chewy with me then tell Mabel and who ever else might be there that the stinger on the end of Chewy’s tail is highly poisonous so dont touch it, I'm working on a treatment, but for now it will lead to extreme pain for twelve hours. They will want to be careful as they play with him.”

 

A cloud of thick dripping smoke formed over the circle then clothing appeared from with in pushing out till the cloth surrounded the smoke making it into a more humanoid shape. Finally the smoke reached into the suit and pulled out a white mask with a red clown face drawn on in exquisite detail except for the missing eyes, settling the mask on where their face would be they looked up, sighed stepped out of the circle and before anyone could react they said, “Ugh, I think I purposely forgot how annoying summons are.”

With that the mood of the room lightened and the occupants of the tabled laughed. Looking around Chazun saw that around the table was Alcor, Mabel, the person they all called Grunkle Stan, Wendy Corduroy the future demon hunter (keep an eye on her), Brian the organ duck, Soos the manchild, and three small redheads which all looked up at him with something between confusion and hilarity. The only boy of the three, Hank was his name spoke up, “a clown face? For poker?” Looking down to get a closer look at the children Chazun decide to have some fun. “Oh, but of course! What better poker face is there the one that can't show emotion AND will distract all your opponents? You seem like a good kid, or at least the nicest one here,” he said. Acacia looked a little miffed at that and Willow stuck her tongue out at him. “Like I said, the best one here, I’m going to win all the candy available, then build a replica of the city of Toronto out of it. After I have destroyed your family at a simple card game they invited em too and finished my beautiful art project you want to go jump down the bottomless pit with me? It will give us twenty three minutes of peace and quiet where I can explain every funny story your family dont want you to know, for the simple reason that I'm a demon and it's been too long since I could cause some chaos?”

“How do you know me? And how do you know about my family?” Hank asked a little defensively

Bending down while staring hank in the face Chazun said, “I know everything kid, the universe is a book, and my summer reading plan consists of only it.” Staring each other tension built in the room suddenly dispurst when Chewy popped up behind Chazun, knocking him over then proceeding to lick all the marker on his face into mere smudges of the masterpiece they were.  
After a few moments Chazun sighed and said, “that ruined all menacing and scary tensions I built up didn't it?”

A chorus of heads bobbed around the table all looking more relaxed, then Mabel noticed Chewy and practically squealed everyone ears out. “OHMYGAWD what is that, it’s so cute, and fluffy, ooh can I pet it?”   
“Yes but be careful of the tail, the stinger is highly poisonous and painful, 12 hours of agony, be careful.” Completely ignoring his warning Mabel ran over and hugged Chewy with one of her well known rib cracking squeezes. 

“IT’S SO FLUFFY!” she screamed after another couple minutes of hugging she took a step back to look at Chewy in all his glory, and this time Chwey leaned in close and opened his mouth to reveal one massive yellow eye with a purple pupil, staring at each other both looking like their ready to forget about the poker game and just go roll in the grass outside. Chewy took a massive lick across Mabel’s face, not even slowing down a beat she wrapped her arms back around Chewy and sat there for almost 5 minutes straight, after Chazun had drawn on a new less weird face still missing eyes but has a beautifully detailed shading with small drawn on lopsided smile.

“OK? Are we gonna start playing, I haven't cheated anything out of anyone in ages.”

After playing a few dozen hands the table learned two things about Chazun’s playing style; one, whenever he would fold he would always do it as soon as possible, and two whenever he didn't fold he would always win the round. It was nearing the end of the game, and the only ones still playing were Chazun, Alcor, and Wendy. Waiting for his turn, Chazun took one look at his cards, erased his mouth and drew on a sinister grin with to many fangs. Before simply stating,

“A̷̡̱̦l͈̮͈͞ḷ̸̨͚ ̢͙̮̣͢I̖̘̻̟̘̠͢n̛̫̭̠̬͓̳”

Alcor staring down Chazun frowned slightly and then also went all in, which was then matched by Wendy. Staring everyone down the three sat there wondering who would make the first sign of weakness, the children stopped petting Chewy to look up at the tension going on at the table, Mabel looked up from the sweater for Chewy she was knitting with extra arm holes, and Brian was just staring while leaking extra large amounts of fluids.

On the table was the king of hearts, the king of clubs, 3 of diamonds, and the ace of clubs, waiting to see what the final card was the tension built even higher. The four of clubs.

With a spectacularly evil and tacky laugh Chazun was the first to reveal his hand

“Full house” In his hand was the ace of spades and the king of hearts.

Damnits and table thumps were loudly shared between Dipper and Wendy, with an even larger detailed smile Chazun reached over the table and pulled the piles of candy over to him before picking up a pack of Reese's cups, opening it then accidentally forgetting about the mask smearing chocolate all over it. Looking down at the offending cup then back up to see both Wendy and Alcor were trying to hold of fits of laughter, Chazun made the mistake of commenting on the situation.

“This has gone from a triumphant victory to feat of humiliation very quickly.”

At that comment both Wendy and Dipper broke into laughter, hearing this all the children in the room and their mother looked up and also broke into laughter. Kind of mift Chazun lifted the bottom of the mask away and slid the offending piece of chocolate underneath.

“Wait, your a demon so antisocial that not only have you basically erased yourself from the face of the earth you wear a mask even when no one knows about you?”

“Hey, all humans can't be complete morons or jerks, but most are, its the same with demons. 99.9% are the cruelest beings you will ever meet outside of politics, but some are just weird, don’t even get me started about the fanclub of demons your uncle has, the point is just because the majority are doesn't mean everyone is.”

“Wait, I have a fanclub of demons?” Alcor said with an utterly pathetic surprised face

“OH YES, the great and all mighty AL-DORK has a bunch of raving fangirls, that for once aren't crazy, into trash books, or both. But that's a topic for another day, if you can excuse me I’m going to go jump into the pit while I still have physical form and can chose to be affected by gravity. Hank you wanna come? I have large amounts of candy and stories your uncle never want to be told.” With that last comment he scooped up all the candy on the table and poured it into the breast pocket of his vest, standing up and walking towards the door, Chazun turned around looked around in an over dramatic imitation of a conspiracist about to topple the throne and whispered a simple sentence. “Guess how many summons your uncle has gotten based off of twin souls fans? Have you seen the weirdness they do? Haven't seen anything like it since a village cursed with madness was discovered, oh those were some hilarious people, so you coming?”

With that last comment all three children looked at each other then with mixed expressions of pure evil and childish goofiness bolted up and ran over to the door.

“Mwahahaha I’m going to be the best demon around these parts, watch yourself Alcor, I have stories so great they have made people physically incapable of emotion spread a tear, by the way you wouldnt miss a pair of annoying ex-government agents would you?”

Sighing loudly Alcor face planted onto the table and simply asked “How did you win, I have the information of the universe at hand to help me cheat, not to mention the numerous other ways I was using to cheat, how did I lose that much candy?”

“Your omniscience has nothing on me sucker! Time to go fall for 23 minutes straight! Bye!” And with that Chazun turned around and walked face first into the door frame.

Staring at the offending wall before shaking his head and walking out the door Chazun could only think he made a nice impression, it was too much fun cheating them out of their candy.

Wendy turned to Dipper and said “Exactly how did you find the only demon that is possibly just as dorky as you are? Also what was that he brought with him, it acted like a dog but was that a large fluffy scorpion tail?”

“Well then, it all started when I found out one of my past reincarnations was Tesla….”


End file.
